A really, really good day!

So I don't normally post back to back days, but I really needed to log today, because it was fabulous! We had ZERO tantrums. Now, granted, today was an "off" day--no therapies, no set agenda--but still.

Here's what we did:

{Backstory: For the last month or so, Bug keeps asking to "go dressed". Or if you say "Let's get dressed" he'll get his shoes on. We've tried explaining that getting dressed means putting on clothes, but it hasn't clicked. Sometimes when we're on the highway, he'll ask to "go dressed" and then get really upset when we exit for home or wherever. Our best guess is that on the day we took him to see all the tractors at a John Deere Store, we told him we had to go get dressed first and he assigned the store the name "dressed"...I know it's a little crazy, but we've been everywhere else and it keeps coming up and it makes at least some sense to me. He's been on it for a month and it's been a month since we were there. Coincidentally, we've been having behavioral problems for a month.}

This morning, I asked Bug if he wanted to get dressed, he ran to get his shoes and I said that we had to put new clothes on and then I would take him where I thought "dressed" was. So I drove him out to the tractor store. He was calm pretty much the whole way, so I *think* (and really freakin' hope) I was right. We didn't get out, but I explained that we couldn't climb on the tractors today because that was just a special thing (Like when we saw goats at the mall). He seemed ok with the explanation (quiet, no crying) and when I asked if he wanted to go to the park, he said please and we left without issue. We played at the park with no issues.

Adam and I had talked last night about how we could break the routine of fighting getting out of the car. We figured that the PRT method would probably be having a motivating reward ready for him that he can take once he's out of the car. Since Bug almost always brings a book or a toy with him to hold, I decided that I'd take it once he was buckled and explain that he could have it once we got out of the car. He wasn't happy at first, but seemed ok with it and both times got out of the car without a fuss when I said he could have the reward. We'll try it again tomorrow at speech, I'm hoping that it's a strong enough motivator that we can at least get him into the building without a fight.

This afternoon was wild, but a heap of fun. Yesterday I had tried filling a tub with soapy water for Bug to play with and it flopped. He "took a bath". Today I made bubble solution and we went out and played with that and the remnants from yesterday. It made a gigantic mess:

He had so much fun. And what I thought was really interesting was that he was giving me a lot of spontaneous verbalizations. He told me "taking a bath" "getting all wet" and "spill" when he dumped out the tub. He also came inside and helped me fill a bucket with more water to play with, asked me to blow bubbles and popped them with his nose. While it wasn't a lot of back and forth, he was a lot more engaged than I've seen him lately. Afterwards I had to rinse him off in our shower because he was a sticky, soapy mess (the solution had sugar in it). He thought that was absolutely hysterical and was just laughing like crazy. :D

Then a bit later he asked for the red paint and took the initiative to get all the paint out. I asked him if he wanted paper and he said please so I put out paper. Then he tried to put paint on the paper himself! With help we got three globs down, he put his fingers in it. I brought him a paint brush and quicker than quicker he did this:

So wonderful! I love that he's willing to use a brush (I'm totally ok with him not liking it on his hands, that's reasonable) AND that this was entirely self-directed. It only lasted a few minutes (during which I was distracted with something else so I wasn't able to work with him at all) but wow, I was so impressed!

The rest of the day went smoothly too. We tried undies (unsuccessfully but at least we tried) and he sat for a good amount of time at dinner too.

Hopefully we can start building momentum and reinforcing good habits and routines instead of bad ones. I'm really hoping that seeing the tractor store will calm him down a bit about going places, but I do think that I'm going to try to substitute "get dressed" for "change clothes" or something of that nature to try to avoid confusion.

Bumps now, big changes ahead!

So much to talk about!

A couple posts ago I talked about the IEP evaluation and how horrid it went. And I said "We're not taking services." And then last week, I started having a change of heart, that maybe it wouldn't be terrible if we enrolled Bug in school. Then on Friday I went to the meeting to actually write up the IEP, and I ended up being surprised by how reasonable the IEP was. Basically, they suggested that we do Early Childhood 5 times a week for half days. I said that was too much to start, but I'd be comfortable with 3 days and they said that was reasonable. The goals were very realistic and I felt like they were good next steps for us. So I said that I wanted to think about it and talk it over with Adam over the weekend. Adam and I talked a lot this weekend, and prayed about what to do. It seemed like every good point had an equally good counterpoint. But by yesterday, I realized that a lot of my "nopes" didn't have super strong reasons--or were fears that every parent has when they first put their children into preschool. So I guess what I'm saying is that we've decided that we're going to accept services. Starting at the end of the month, Bug will be attending a nearby school 3 days a week. We'll still continue our speech and OT privately, and I feel like I still have plenty of time to work with him at home, and he'll still have lots and lots of time to spend with his neurotypical peers. AND, if we feel like it's a poor fit, we can take him back out or make changes to the IEP. We know that it's not the absolutely best fit, but it's at least a step in the right direction and we feel good about that.

Bug had his first Sunday School class this weekend! We had a little trouble getting in, and a lot of trouble paying attention, but we got through it and it was not a bad start. We also spent a little time in the church service, which was harder for him. From what I can tell, it's a little overstimulating for him. But again, it was at least a start and I think that if we can make it a consistent routine, we'll end up being very successful.

Another good thing: We finally have a plan for the PRT training I've been trying to line up forever! Unfortunately, the Virginia Tech thing didn't pan out, but we are able to do online sessions with the Koegel Center and are currently working on making videos for them to evaluate. I'm excited to finally get some feedback from someone who's trained so we can start incorporating PRT into our lives and our therapies.

Bug also used a paintbrush for the first time this weekend! He actually asked for paint and was fairly interested in it!

We are still having such major struggles with going places, especially to speech. Bug gets so frustrated and upset if we don't go where he wants. The visual schedule helps a little, in that he can see where we're headed, but he gets really upset if we don't go to the right place or if we're doing a nonpreferred activity. Today at speech was seriously awful and it just breaks my heart. Bug didn't want to leave the house, but then in the car was ok and he was laughing up until I made him get out of the car. Then it was an epic tantrum that lasted the entire session plus. Hitting, screaming, crying, the whole bit. Kathy and I feel like it's more of a control thing or a new routine than separation anxiety, but it's so hard to tell. He would actually behave worse if she praised his good behavior. It was definitely the hardest therapy session we've been in. Hands down.

The next couple of weeks are going to be a bit of limbo. I've kind of resigned myself to just taking it day by day and powering through. I'm hoping that once school starts for Bug that I'll be able to focus on him better and hopefully we can power through some of these behavioral and emotional issues we're having. We could definitely use a break!

Walk for Autism Speaks

A bit of self-promotion here. We found out about a charity walk for Autism Speaks coming up in a couple of weeks and decided to participate!

I know a lot of times people don't like donating to big charities because of the "where does the money go factor" so I thought I'd talk a little bit about why we're participating and asking for donations. I always think it's wise to know what you're donating to and of course, encourage you to do your own research as well. Anyway.

Autism Speaks is probably the best-known autism foundation. They are probably one of the best resources out there, certainly for people new to the world of ASD. I think almost everyone we've talked to about autism, pre- and post-diagnosis listed Autism Speaks as a resource. They have lists of "red flags" and tons of information on different treatments and a wonderful guide called "The 100 Day Kit" that helps provide a guide for newly-diagnosed families. I frequently visit their website when I'm doing research about therapies and went through the 100 Day Kit to help myself get organized after Bug was diagnosed. Even more, Autism Speaks does a lot of advocating on behalf of families with kids on the spectrum. When Adam was talking to his company about getting ABA covered, he needed more information and was able to get in contact with someone at Autism Speaks who replied the same day and offered to actually work with the HR department directly.

One of the biggest struggles we've faced so far is that so much information on resources is scattered across the city and the internet. It is so helpful to have a website that I can count on as a starting point and a wonderful resource that I can encourage others to use as well. We are proud to support Autism Speaks and are grateful that the support it provides.

We are hoping to raise $300 as a family. If you want to donate to our "team" (which is really just our family):
Adam's Donation Page
 Kim's Donation Page

Thanks!